For those of you with kids, give them a big hug

and tell them that you love them, because you can't always know what's going on beneath the surface.




16 Year Old Softball Phenom Takes Her Own Life


Quote:
"She wanted her ashes to be sprinkled all over a softball field because that's where she lived," Martinez said about Matthews, who had a 14-4 pitching record as a freshman last year for Mater Dei (Calif.) High School. "It didn't matter where. As long as it was a softball field with a mound. That's where she dominated."

Always an overachiever, Matthews had gotten it done off and on the softball diamond. She carried a 4.0 grade point average at academically testing Mater Dei and was committed to pursue a career as a neonatologist. Despite being only a high school sophomore, Matthews already had accepted a full-ride college scholarship offer to play softball for national powerhouse Arizona after she graduated in 2012. A phenom.

Socially? Forget about it. At 16, Matthews had friends for days, thanks to a dynamic personality and her huge softball following. Considered the No.1 young pitching prospect in the nation, Matthews had a way for attracting crowds and had grown into a Pied Piper character for the sport.

Quote:
According to official reports, on the night of Matthews' death, Anaheim fire and police were sent to the family's apartment regarding a girl not breathing. Paramedics administered CPR to the girl and she was taken to a local hospital where she was pronounced dead at 8:22 p.m. PT.

The Orange County Coroner's report ruled Matthews' death a suicide, "by ligature hanging."

"I don't believe it was spontaneous," said Bill Jackson, who coached Matthews for three years when she played for the Firecrackers, a youth softball travel team based in Orange County. "She was depressed. Everything you hear indicates to us that it was something that was thought out a little bit. She knew what to do and how to do it. ... Teenagers and the internet nowadays. I don't think we're ever going to know why she did it."

Quote:
"It was just a terrible shock," Kelly said about Matthews, who on the day of her suicide reportedly gave her athletic bag to a teammate and told her that she likely would not need it the next day. "You don't know if she put too much pressure on herself or what. But the thing is, she had so much going for her. She had a full-ride for college and a bright future. You just had to think that everything was good with her."



http://www.fanhouse.com/2010/0...all-and-sorrow/

bsky,

This reminds me of what happened to a 17 yr old girl in a town I used to live in. Same type of person, tragic. For anyone raising kids, it is always a fear.

Pete

Yeah- it really struck me when I read it. So sad. Very perspective-enhancing.

My sister took her own life. It is hard to understand but some people are in so much pain they cant bear living. You got to let em go.

Damn Jeb- sorry to hear that. What you're saying makes a lot of sense.

sky

there are way worse things than dying. I have seen it. With Kellye my sis I was in a weird way happy for her. She was free from all that torment she had made for herself. Released. Oddly Kellye was a bad ass softball player. Switch hitter. Tough as nails...on the field.

baby,
I remember a story about a real successful track athelete, a runner, years ago who one day just took off on her run and ran to a bridge and jumped off...people were stunned, of course. It's hard to really get inside someone else's world and know how much they may be suffering. I agree with you, hug those you love, now....

Sky,

Thanks for the thoughtful reminder. Aside from being an extremely sad event, it should be a signal to all of us. Whenever an acquaintance says or does something that doesn't quite computer (like saying she likely wouldn't need her athletic bag the next day, we need to get those antennae up and follow up. Better to risk being chastized for nosiness than to risk losing a friend if there's anything that can be done about it.

I had a friend who moved to San Francisco, and we kept in touch sporadically. One day, I had the sudden urge to call Sherman, and i did. He answered the phone, and I asked how he was doing. He said, "Well I know you won't believe this, but I was just in the bathroom getting ready to commit suicide. Well, I didn't believe it, but we did talk about it...and he revealed a problem that he just couldn't cope with. And, at the end of the conversation, he promised to get some very needed help. He did get the help and lived for several more years before succumbing to kidney disease. I'll never know whether he would really have done it, but we had several later opportunities to get together and laugh together about it, and his quality of life was pretty good until the disease got him.

Sam

There are many young people who have such a terrible time living up to the expectations of those around them. It is a scary thought that you might talk to someone today, and they are gone tomorrow. The saddest part is that you never had a chance to even say goodbye. Jeb, I don't know what the circumstances were with your sister, but, you are right, you have to let them go. If you don't, your life will be hell. Love them while they are here, pray for them when they are gone. Sam...your friend was lucky to have a friend like you. Believe it or not, you may have been the one reason he lived a longer life than expected. My experiences with sudden death were not suicide, but just bad health. I have lost a brother in law at 36, one at 38, a father in law at 48 and a brother in law who became a quad at 21, (car accident). Sudden death is terrible, but losing someone who takes their own life has got to be worse.

What a sad story. This would haunt me if she were mine.

Rosalie t

With Kellye it was drugs. Oxycontin in paticular. She always had a pull to pills. But had it somewhat under control. But she got into a car wreck and went from vicodin on up til finally the oxy. It just took her. I have never seen anything like it. We came from a screwed up home so we really only had each other. We were very close. By the end she was still up walking around but it was not her.

She had a lot of laughs in life too. really first rate sense of humor. I saw her go through so much with her depression and mental illness that I felt almost no guilt when she passed. I had done every single thing I could. But you always wonder and it never goes away. I miss her every day. But I am so glad she is out of that torment. It's weird. But I am indeed happy for her and fell really settled in knowing she is at peace.