LIFE AND OTHER ODDITIES (AN ONGOING THREAD)

[Sam]

This is where to post any insights you wish to share about tips or devices that help you get through life: addressing relationship issues; experiences with medical situations and solutions; dealing with loss; whatever.

[Hoopdeedoo]

Oddities, yeah I guess this might be that. I thought I'd share some real dumb stuff with you'all.

I just realized I'm starting to get old..... I mean I know that already(I just turned 55) but I think the light bulb just went on last night. You know when you have an epiphany about something? It sucks when that something tells you more time is behind you than in front of you.

I was thinking about getting a new cell phone and told my wife I'd shop online with Tmobile and pick one out. I really don't use mine much anymore so I thought this would be an easy task. Well I learned that I knew nearly nothing about the technology available on the damn things.

What's a Smartphone?
Link to facebook?
Tweet easily and share contacts with Who?
GPS in the Phone? (I was gonna ask Santa for a portable one for my motorcycle riding but now it comes in a phone) Who Knew! Not me.
Whats video tracking?
The list goes on from here.

I just never thought of myself as being out of touch with the new technology. That's for old guys. Remember people hating answering machines? Not me. Hell, I even sold cell phones in the 90's. But I just realized that was 15 years ago. A millineum by today's standard of evolving communications.

I probably will try to suck it up and get an up to date unit that is already obsolete and figure out how to use it in a couple years.

Ok now here is the point I am hoping to make. I think what I felt was fear. Fear of time flying by much too fast without holding on to it. Not being a valid person by today's standards. That feeling must be what some retired people feel when left without purpose. Even though I work and hopefully contribute to our society I still had that little scary feeling time is passing by much too quickly. I'm working on it though.

My dad passed in 1989 at 77 years old. Before he died he told me how amazed he was at how things (computers and communications especially) had progressed in his lifetime. He wished his dad could see some of the those things as he was born in 1878 and literally rode horse and buggys and watchhed the industrial evolution and was captivated by that.

I wish I could have my dad now for a day and take him cell phone shopping!

Life is short. Just saying.

Hoop

[Sam]

Hoop,

It truly is scary. In the first place, I've believed for some time that technology is evolving much more quickly than our ability to control and use it constructively. At the same time, I feel society has become more hedonistic. The confluence of those two trends is frightening to me. The arts are disappearing; and I'm not referring to the classical arts but, rather to the art of conversation, the art of social skills, the art of writing...those kinds of things.

Every generation has complained about trends like these, and every generation is reminded of that fact by newer generations. However, it seems to me that there must be some finite limit of technology's march toward "victory" that can be assimilated by society.

My daughters, who dragged me, kicking and screaming, into the email age perhaps a dozen years ago, were dumbfounded when I recently announced that my wife and I had purchased blackberries. They understood when we subsequently announced that they make great doorstops.

Sam

[Outside]

Trends are such an eye-of-the-beholder thing.

I look at my kids texting all the time and see a generation losing social skills, while my kids think of themselves as vastly more socially active and connected.

Sam, you make yourself sound like a near-Luddite resisting new technology, yet you've taken to the electronic dissemination of the written word like a duck to water, founded an Internet forum, and posted volumes of material here and elsewhere. I don't see you and Hoop as oldsters hopelessly stuck in another age who don't "get" smart phones; I see that smart phones don't have value and utility for your lifestyle.

I'm sure there are some in older generations who dig in their heels and resist new technology, but for the most part, I think people are willing to adopt new technology if it provides value. Cell phone marketers would have us believe that everyone should want handheld computers with 24/7 Internet connectivity so that we can press a single button to make an instant reservation at the restaurant identified on a real-time Google Earth street view of my current location automatically tracked by GPS. But that's marketing.

I have friends my age (I'm 54) who use smart phones because they're useful for their situation, mostly because they need to access email from any location. A natural progression follows -- they find other useful functions like real-time traffic conditions or GPS driving directions, they use them as photo and video cameras, then they find marginally useful and/or entertaining applications, and voila -- they're immersed in the smart phone world. But it's all driven by the technology actually being useful in the first place for them and they way they live. I happen to work at home and don't have a compelling use for a smart phone, so I have a cell phone that I mainly use as just a phone because I don't need it for all the stuff that my friends do.

Most people will gladly accept technology they find useful. My mom and dad are in their 80's, and they find common technology like remote controls and microwaves valuable and easy enough to use. My dad is on the computer a lot and is well versed in the world of Macs, but that was driven by the value he found in email and genealogy applications. Now he monitors the daily output of the solar cells on his roof, controls his landscape watering by satellite, and watches YouTube videos. My mom, on the other hand, has never found the computer useful enough to get familiar with it; the main thing she's ever wanted it for is recipes, but transcribing all her old stuff is more trouble than it's worth, so she uses her perfectly functional paper-based recipe system and has my dad help her if she needs to find a web site or do anything on the computer.

The point is, I don't think we should consider ourselves hopelessly outdated if we're not on the bleeding edge of technological advances. That's marketers who want our money talking.

To this point, I can't justify paying all the ridiculous monthly charges to get all that smart phone capability. However, when we were driving to a boy scout outing not long ago, we were discussing whether a planet in the night sky was Jupiter, Mars, or Saturn, and a dad in my vehicle used an app on his iPhone that allowed him to hold up his phone and see which objects were in the sky in that direction. I've always loved astronomy, and hey, that's cool. So I may have an iPhone in my future.

Outside

[Hoopdeedoo]

Sam,

I'm with you on the art of conversation being interrupted at least with the phone thing. The other day I met a friend for a black and tan and a cigar that I see infrequently. While talking sports every time a question came up he was searching on his phone for the answer. I said it really doesnt matter to me who is the second best assist guy after Rondo so why look it up? It is just a talking point. And by the way next time take your phone out for a beer and a cigar if that's what you want to do. He laughed and put it in his pocket but it killed him to not have it in or near his hand.

Outside,

I agree that if there is value people will get with it. I suppose I was more of loathing in my own self pity during a technology experience. As I get older though I'm less taken in by the marketers and more listening to my own needs. To your point, you don't need the extra charges to just "have what they tell you to have" so just go about with what works for you.

Gotta go, got an email-tweet-facebook-myspace-stupid picture from a friend in my network from high school I haven't talked to in 35 years.

Geesh,
Hoop

[Sam]

Outside,

Sorry if I sound like like a curmudgeon. The rule I always give friends for dealing with me is to run everything I say through a filter to ascertain that it's not intended to be humorous before attaching literal meaning to it. Seriously, that's my nature. No, we don't really use our BlackBerries as doorstops.

But I'm deadly serious in my concern about the proliferation of technology. I'm not at all upset at the fact of its growth. I'm concerned about the nature of its growth. And my concern stems from the fact that I always have been, am now, and will always be a people person.

I believe that an important element of the human condition is the social nature of human beings. I was born near the end of the Great Depression, in which so many people found that life could be easier when they cooperated with, and aided, one another. Then came WWII, during which there was an outpouring of human collaboration whose like we almost certainly will never see again.

Certainly the impact of enhanced technology was not absent during that time. We went to movies in large crowds to be informed about developments during the war. And, during the decade that followed, I recall crowding around our radio to listen to the Coronation of a young woman in England.

But the artifacts of technology in those days tended to bring people together. We were encouraged as children to develop our imagination by listening to radio broadcasts, but we usually did it on the one radio in our home and with friends or the family. For a while, that was also true of television—until the technocrats found that they could make more money by offering numerous simultaneous choices, thus multiplying the number of television sets in each home and segmenting the audience.

For a while, television tended to blunt the development of imaginations. Then video games and a host of other technological self-entertainment devices whose names I couldn't care less about began to fill the gap. But, in doing so, they tended to make people more individualistic and less socially inclined. Companies now need human resource specialists to help people to work together effectively, whereas it used to be more of an instinct.

Kids now text in school, underneath the desks, in order to cheat. And that's just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to ways in which technology has contributed to wrongdoing of all kinds. It's also an illustration of a major concern I have about the proliferation of technology. We are not developing controls on technology that begin to equal the advances in technology itself.

I freely admit that I use many elements of technology. Back when I typed my research reports, I was able to leverage a certain distinctiveness in my work. The computer came along, and everyone began copying the successful innovations of everyone else so that the nature of output in our field because generically undifferentiated. I guess that's progress of a sort because at least the computer speeded up what I could do. But clients now were preoccupied by the need for speed at all costs. Quality pretty much had to fend for itself. They no longer wanted thoughtful, insightful reports. They just wanted bullets and PowerPoint. It became much more difficult to compete with any sort of differentiation than when technology was in much earlier phases. Clients now assumed all our work was the same and they only cared about who would undercut whom pricewise. I guess that's progress of a sort.

I'd dearly love to see a grand balance sheet listing all the artifacts of technology according to their advent, decade by decade. And, beside each artifact, I'd like to see an evaluation of whether it has contributed more to the togetherness of mankind or to the individuality of mankind. There's my social conscience popping up again.

To a certain extent, we all have choices in the uses to which we put technology. Personally, I feel uncomfortable if I'm using it at the expense of what I'd call "sociality." Yes, I email for convenience sake, but I'd much more prefer a phone conversation. I spend hours trying to outwit telephone menus by making strange sounds on my end because I'd prefer human interaction. (Perhaps companies feel they have no animal equipped to converse with what's on the other end of the line.) I am reluctant to leave voice mail messages because I feel I haven't done my job unless I know the other person received my message.

My wife and I have used a computer to write a book that will be on the market within a matter of hours. Yup, technology was our partner. BUT our objective in writing the book has never been money but rather to encourage (hopefully) hordes of PEOPLE to grow to love Paris the way we do. Other people were our only reason for embarking on this adventure more than 15 years ago.

I couldn't have entered nearly as many graduate programs of study without the help of technology. But it's important to note that, in one of them, I could have majored in either psychology of sociology. I chose the latter because it's (to oversimplify) the study of how people hang together or hang separately. PEOPLE, collectively, were the issue. Whenever I've used technology, I like to think some element of humanity has somehow been involved in that process; and the use to which the results have been put did not shortchange humanity.

Take this forum. Please. (Thanks Henny Youngman.) What could be more high tech? I started it because I felt people were being unfairly treated on another forum and needed an alternative. I started it not to make money but because it gave me an opportunity to share my Celtics allegiance with others. I started it in hopes that some spirit of camaraderie would come to fruition. This use of technology made sense to me within those contexts. PEOPLE were the issue. I could have sat around and played video games, while rooting for the Celtics in isolation. Heck, for the most part, I did that for decades.

I've done social research for a living. One day, I received a solicitation from a company that had interviewed 3,000 people on all sorts of topics. They claimed that, if I sent them a questionnaire on people's opinions, they had a wonderful high-tech program that would permit them to tell me how those 3,000 people would have answered if subjected to my questionnaire. I called it the "Study of the Dead" on the basis that, as time progressed, more and more of the "respondents" would actually be answering from the grave. This is just one of many ways in which the research profession is moving farther and farther away from necessitating personal interaction in studies. There are other ways (including handwriting analysis, analysis of people's garbage, voice pitch and eye pupillometrics analysis, and of course the scanning that we encounter at the supermarket).

Maybe all of these developments are beneficial because the potential subjects of research are too busy to be bothered anyway, since they're texting, e-mailing, on their mobile phones, or otherwise engaged in minimizing human contact through technology.

Perhaps it's a good thing that technology is moving in the direction of promoting individualism more than "sociality"...nd controlling, more and more, the boundaries of whatever "sociality" does take place. Maybe it's just as well that our ability to control the impact of technology has not (in my opinion) kept pace with the rise of technology.

I'm sure an easy answer to what I'm saying is that the existence of society is not changing; it's the nature of society that's changing. People who grow up surrounded by technology will become used to it and will learn to deal with it constructively. I hope that's true.

Maybe there's no future point of no return at which evolving forms of technology will become ends in themselves (with absolutely no controls) and will no longer be the means to anything. Perhaps society (if that word means anything at that point) will benefit by not having its version of "social conscience" cluttered by human interaction. Maybe all basketball games will be played electronically, thereby avoiding injuries, and people will look back on the "bad old days" when players actually had to compete on the court—a colosseum mentality if there ever was one.

I suppose it really doesn't matter as long as the Cyber-Celtics are then working on Banner #658 and the Cyber-Lakers are stuck on#643.

Sam

[gyso]

Hoopdeedoo,

I was thinking of you the other day. Perhaps you don't know, but I am in Florida to attend my oldest daughter's wedding. We are in Deerfield Beach, Florida. On the flight down, we flew through Georgia and crossed into Florida right over Jacksonville.

I had a window seat on the left side of the plane and could see the beach. I knew St. A was just south of Jacksonville and told my wife that a member of the board lived there.

I was shouting, "Hoop, Hoop, look up!!! Its me, gyso!!" Everyone on the plane near me told me to sit down and shut up, but I kept on. Finally the Air Marshall on the plane jumped me from behind and subdued me in handcuffs for the rest of the flight.

Okay, that last bit wasn't true, but I was thinking of you.

gyso

[Outside]

And by the way next time take your phone out for a beer and a cigar if that's what you want to do. He laughed and put it in his pocket but it killed him to not have it in or near his hand.

Hoop, that's just too funny. The "but it killed him to not have it" part shows how it is an addictive habit more than anything. I've seen lots of people fall into that trap.

Sam, no worries -- I knew what you meant about the Blackberries. And I agree with a lot of what you say about technology's impact on society. To me, the answer lies in the old proverb, "All things in moderation and moderation in all things." People have to find the right way to deal with it. (Of course, Mark Twain said, "All things in moderation, including moderation," so I guess a little excess now and then can be healthy, too.) I just have to have faith that people are social animals and will reverse the trend toward technological isolation.

One last story on the subject. Our boy scout troop went on a backpack trip to Yosemite last year. Due to a logistical error -- we arrived too late at the ranger station to pick up our wilderness permit -- we couldn't go straight to the backpack camp in Little Yosemite Valley (on the trail to Half Dome) and instead had to spend the first night in the backcountry. It wound up having an unexpected benefit because hiking from point A to point B on our second day meant going along the Panorama Trail, which I'd never been on. We found a great spot to enjoy the view while we had our lunch. Gorgeous weather and a truly spectacular view away from the crowds. What could be better? Nothing could possibly ruin this, except... every other adult pulled out their cell phone and made a call. Sheesh. We specifically forbid the boys to bring cell phones, and adults bring them but supposedly for emergency purposes only, but here they are, on the phone instead of enjoying total immersion in the joy of backpacking. I had a cell phone too, but the thought of making a call hadn't even occurred to me. I love my wife, but I think she enjoyed the story more when we were back home and told her about it in person and she saw the expressions on our faces.

Outside

[Sam]

Great anecdote, Outside. And proof that technology does permeate all generations, to the point that it can actually have a "trickle down" effect on the younger set. I guess "moderation" is in the eye of the "moderator."

Sam

[Hoopdeedoo]

gyso,

You know I thought I heard you calling. But I just figured it was the "other voices in my head" talking to me again. Thanks for thinking of me.

Outside,

Great story. I was at the Jaguars/Raiders game yesterday and there was a lot of scoring (6 plays over 30 yards each) so it was exciting with the home team coming from 10 points down to win. But I had to be careful with who I could high five so I wouldn't knock their personal communication devices out of their hands!

Hoop

[Sam]

This is something to think about when negative people are doing their best to rain on your parade. Remember this story the next time someone who knows nothing and cares less tries to make your life miserable.

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband.. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:

" Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser. " That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late.
So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."

"Don't go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks its gonna be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the woman again came in for a hairdo. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful," explained the woman, "not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot..

And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5 million remodeling job, and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me.."

"Oh, really! What'd he say ?"

He said: "Who screwed up your hair?"

[Hoopdeedoo]

Sam,

Very funny. Sometimes we listen to those hairdressers of the world and make their opinions our own. We are currently in paradise on a vacation and the owner of this hotel we are at is burned out and extremely negative. You'd think life sucks for him here in Costa Rica. We just smile and go on our excursions and come back refreshed. Thanks for a good story on a thread I thought may need to be scrapped because guess who started it!!

Hoop

[jeb]

gyso

good to see you round! where / how you been?

[Sam]

Hoop,

From Florida to Costa Rica. Life is tough, huh? Hope you're having a fabulous time. We can count on you not to let people like that owner get to you.

Have fun, and a safe trip home.

Sam

[Hoopdeedoo]

Sam,

Sold the restaurant and are taking a walkabout to see what's next. Tell Mrs. Sam not to worry, I didn't forget how to make grits! Thanks for the well wishes.

Hoop

[Sam]

Hoop,

It sounds as though hearty congratulations are in order, although we had really looked forward to seeing the restaurant. I know that some day (I hope sooner than later) Mrs. Sam will take you up on those grits. In fact, she had a lengthy discussion with a friend about grits a couple of days ago (obviously they both have a lot of time on their hands), and that brought up the subjct of your restaurant.

Was the car part of the deal, or is it still sticking out the front in perpetuity?

Please keep us informed as to where you land. Wherever it is, all the best and we hope you have WiFi.

Very exciting!

Sam

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