Cleveland's West Reported Domestic Violence

Domestic dispute for Cavs' West
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Associated Press
INDEPENDENCE, Ohio -- The wife of Cleveland Cavaliers guard Delonte West has filed a domestic violence report against her husband.


West
The report, filed with Cleveland police on Sunday, says that Kimberly West met with authorities at Cleveland Hopkins International Airport, where she had gone to fly to her father's house in New Jersey.

In the report, she says that Delonte West had accused her of cheating on him and that they had argument in which he grabbed her and took her wedding ring and purse.

Police said Monday the case remains under investigation and that no charges have been filed. WOIO-TV in Cleveland first reported the complaint.

Cavaliers coach Mike Brown says the team is aware of the report and is monitoring the situation. West's agent, Noah Croom, didn't immediately respond to a message seeking comment.

West has not appeared in any preseason games, and Brown has not decided whether West will be active for the season opener Tuesday against Boston. West was at the Cavs' practice Monday but was not made available to the media.

West, who has been treated in the past for bipolar disorder, twice left the team during training camp for personal reasons. He is also facing misdemeanor weapons possession charges stemming from a September arrest in Maryland.

Sounds like West's life is unravaling. Hope he gets effective help for the bi-polar disorder.

Unfortunately this is starting to look like another case of an athlete whose physical gifts could have lifted him out of a troubled start to life, but his old habits dragged him back down. Worse yet in this case, because West apparently has a disorder that makes the challenge even more daunting.

I always liked his game and his grit because he was the lighthearted tough little underdog. You could sense his determination and drive back in his days at St. Joe's and it carried at least into his first years in the league with the Celtics. Hard to predict where he goes from here but I hope he pulls out of this tailspin.

I am a little tired of the Poor Mr West BS.

We all have difficulties in life....many of which could be solved with the kind of money that Delonte makes. Yet somehow, he cant get the help he needs to get his shit together.

Sorry, but his act is getting old - and the fact that the NBA hasnt come down HARD on him makes them look like the buffoons the most often are.

MrKleen, no offense, but once you've walked a foot in his shoes, you're free to judge. I have, and you clearly have not. Of course, like the rest of us you're free to judge no matter what, but that doesn't necessarily make it an informed opinion. NBA basketball is a child's game in comparison, and I'm glad folks in the NBA and the Cavs organization understand what is going on with him. That being said, I do agree that he should not get a free pass for his actions, and people definitely stop giving a shit that you're Bipolar once the transgressions pile up, so for that I don't blame them and I do understand. As I said, I've been there. I'm just not sure why people would accept a mental condition such as, say, Alzheimers, but dismiss another illness every bit as traumatic to the brain.

I dealt with my problems and took responsibility for my illness, got my life together and moved past the ridiculousness which the illness loves to accentuate. I'm not "over it", but I've learned to manage it in the last 10 years so that I don't ride around like Antonia Banderas. It wasn't easy, and I'm not going to defend what Delonte does or compare what I've been through to what he's going through, apples and oranges. Being bipolar certainly is not an excuse for doing f'ed up things, but it is what it is. Imagine being on a strong cocktail of methamphetamines, LSD and copious amounts of cocaine, if you can, multiply by (my rough estimate) 1000, and that's what is occuring naturally in the brain during a manic episode. Naturally. And that's only the mania, nevermind the cycling or depression.

And when he does get his life back together, if he does? He's the only one who will ultimately have to deal with the consequences of his actions. Trust me, I've been down that road and his punishment is coming 100 fold, regardless of what the NBA does. I hate to preach about this kind of thing, but you or anyone else would do the same if I mocked cancer or ALS. I can assure you, it's not an act. I don't blame you for getting sick of hearing the excuses. I put my family and friends through a lot of shit when I was sick, and it sucked for them as much as myself, but please do not trivialize what it is for some dude who needs to take an aspirin and get over it.

i've dealth with family that daily faces mental ilness. specifically as a number of the old boston globe crew know, that person is my father.

since the mid 90's ive basically had two fathers, the one who i've known my entire life, and the guy who'se med's are not working.

the second guy ive had to stand between him and other members of my family to prevent him from hurting, ive spent days alongside my mother waiting for him to come home after he's suddenly disapeared. ive listend to him threated to kill himself and wachted him be taken away in a cruiser to a hospital after he's hurt himself..

the first guy, is one of the finest human beings ive ever met- and my hero..

when a person has a mental disability- those who see the effects of that disorder/ilnness can judge them easily.. yet seldom have a clear picture of who that person is...

greengenes has a point, people tend to dismiss illnesses like the ones my father and delonte suffer as though u can pop a pill and everything is going to be ok...

even when u take ur meds sometimes they wont work 100%, and as was in my dads case, the meds that did him the most good for his mental illnesses he turned out to be alergic to, and they nearly killed him. or after a time, the meds becomes less effective. My father is pretty much out of options medically, if the meds he uses now become less effective the only option left is shock theropy..

i dont know west's medical situation, i do know that those who know him, not only like him, but care for him a great deal- thats speaks volumes about who Delonte West truely is...

the effects of his illness - not just what we read about in terms of his legal problems/ professional issues, but the stress it puts on him when he's well- and those close to him can be a living hell..

no matter what team delonte west plays for i'm always going to cheer him on.. the fact that he's succseeded this far [making to the nba] ive often mentioned to my father and its encouraged him.

I'm not going to make excuses for west.. but it seems this is a good guy with problems- the reason for those is a medical condition. I wont knock a person for being ill....

This is far more than a basketball topic, and a very serious one. Thanks to those who are thoughtful enough to share personal experiences in this area. I've witnessed and lived through bipolar disorder through people close to me.

To someone not similarly afflicted, it can almost seems that it MUST be some kind of act. But it's no act when the mind imposes its will on a person. The feeling of knowing what's occurring but being powerless to stop it extends well beyond frustrating and into the realm of perceived irreversibility.

Those of us who feel reasonably in control should be extremely grateful because the sensation of losing control has to be one of the most traumatic things in life. I salute all who have faced it personally or vicariously, and I wish Delonte all the best.

Sam

Matty


Everybody but me in my direct family (mother, sister, dad) did a stretch in a mental hospital. And it took them all in one way or another. My sister lost her battle with it most recently and it was lifelong.

The drugs had her so bad I couldnt talk to her or see her for the last six months and when we had her funeral service (my wife and I had to fly in a hurry from honduras) i didnt have any pictures with me so I had to rely on others for that. The pics that were recent made me ache. SHe was in such pain and so miserable and it was so clear. As weird as it sounds I was relieved for her that she was gone and didnt have to suffer like that any more.

"Suck it up" or any other bullshit people who don't know say dont quite cut it.

Any way I am exhausted and this prolly aint the place for shit so heavy but sports fans I will tell you this, Mental illness is real and it is so painful for the people that suffer from it that they will do anything at all for some relief.
jeb

MrGreenGenes wrote:MrKleen, no offense, but once you've walked a foot in his shoes, you're free to judge. I have, and you clearly have not. Of course, like the rest of us you're free to judge no matter what, but that doesn't necessarily make it an informed opinion. NBA basketball is a child's game in comparison, and I'm glad folks in the NBA and the Cavs organization understand what is going on with him. That being said, I do agree that he should not get a free pass for his actions, and people definitely stop giving a shit that you're Bipolar once the transgressions pile up, so for that I don't blame them and I do understand. As I said, I've been there. I'm just not sure why people would accept a mental condition such as, say, Alzheimers, but dismiss another illness every bit as traumatic to the brain.

I dealt with my problems and took responsibility for my illness, got my life together and moved past the ridiculousness which the illness loves to accentuate. I'm not "over it", but I've learned to manage it in the last 10 years so that I don't ride around like Antonia Banderas. It wasn't easy, and I'm not going to defend what Delonte does or compare what I've been through to what he's going through, apples and oranges. Being bipolar certainly is not an excuse for doing f'ed up things, but it is what it is. Imagine being on a strong cocktail of methamphetamines, LSD and copious amounts of cocaine, if you can, multiply by (my rough estimate) 1000, and that's what is occuring naturally in the brain during a manic episode. Naturally. And that's only the mania, nevermind the cycling or depression.

And when he does get his life back together, if he does? He's the only one who will ultimately have to deal with the consequences of his actions. Trust me, I've been down that road and his punishment is coming 100 fold, regardless of what the NBA does. I hate to preach about this kind of thing, but you or anyone else would do the same if I mocked cancer or ALS. I can assure you, it's not an act. I don't blame you for getting sick of hearing the excuses. I put my family and friends through a lot of shit when I was sick, and it sucked for them as much as myself, but please do not trivialize what it is for some dude who needs to take an aspirin and get over it.

I have plenty of sympathy for Delonte, but if you need help GET IT. There are lots of people batting mental illness without the means to take care of themselves properly. Meanwhile, West makes lots and lots of money, and could very easily afford the best care on earth. Yet he continues to make poor decision after poor decision, and endanger his family and friends, his teammates and the NBA in general.

You are right, I never have experienced mental illness. But I also know lots of people that play that card as a blanket excuse for escaping from the real world. I have been working full time since I was 15, I get up every morning and go to do what I have to do to feed my family, all for a fraction of what people like Delonte West make. If he wants to get his life together, he has every opportunity to do so. But it seems that he is more interested in running around crying “poor me”, then actually doing what it takes to get his condition under control. Maybe a nice stay in state prison will do him some good.

So,I'm assuming,from reading your missive,that you have all the facts of what's really going on with Delonte on a day to day basis.Or is the severe "judgement" you cast from newswire snippets when his behavior goes south.
I get a chuckle when someone throws out the "I get up every morning and go to do what I have to do....".
I wouldn't dare begin to suggest what is or what isn't going on with Delonte---don't know what treatment he is receiving,what medications he's on.......but most importantly how his brain is functioning.
May I suggest that you don't either.

It SOUNDS good to advise people with mental illness to take care of themselves, but it's not always as easy as that. Some people have to work through the stigma of seeking help. But that's just the beginning. The "help" doesn't consist of turning some key and instantly unlocking whatever's messing things up. The "help" doesn't involve some quick fix surgery to remove the problem areas.

The "help" typically consists of periodic visits, diagnoses, new discoveries, new diagnoses, and often-experimental prescription of meds. The volatility of the illness makes the meds prescriptions very chancy. Just when the dosage seems right, the system undergoes a change and things get worse. More diagnoses, more meds experimentation—and all the time, the patient's losing confidence in the "help" and increasingly frustrated at the lack of progress and the incessant feeling of being out of control. I've known people for whom it has taken well over a year just to settle on a reasonably stable medication situation.

Part of being fortunate enough to have avoided personal experience with these problems is to be unaware of the tremendous imprecision involved in treating mental illness, the fluctuating dimensions of mental illness that make it a "moving target" for treatment, and the long-term debilitating effects on the patient as (s)he takes one step forward and two backward.

People tend to hear the word "illness" and assume there's a quick fix for mental illness, as though it were a clogged artery. Seldom is that the case. And, while a clogged artery may be the result of ill-advised behavior on the part of the patient (smoking, eating the wrong foods, etc.), mental illness is very often not due to any transgressions by the patient other than the very act of being alive.

Sam

DJ wrote:So,I'm assuming,from reading your missive,that you have all the facts of what's really going on with Delonte on a day to day basis.Or is the severe "judgement" you cast from newswire snippets when his behavior goes south.
I get a chuckle when someone throws out the "I get up every morning and go to do what I have to do....".
I wouldn't dare begin to suggest what is or what isn't going on with Delonte---don't know what treatment he is receiving,what medications he's on.......but most importantly how his brain is functioning.
May I suggest that you don't either.

If you could show me facts that say that NO ONE with bi-polar disorder is a functioning, law abiding member of our society – then I would agree that I am 100% wrong here. But we all know that it not the case. There are plenty of people that have all kinds of mental illness, that work hard through therapy and medication and ongoing treatment to keep their demons at bay, if not conquer them over the long haul.

I am again not trying to diminish what Delonte is going through, but if you are a person with severe mental illness, being a millionaire puts you in the BEST POSSIBLE POSITION to receive the finest treatment that is available.

If you refuse to get help, or worse, gets help and then don’t stick to the medication and treatment. Who is to blame?

I volunteer one afternoon a week to feed people with chronic illness and mental disability and see brave, courageous souls that are trapped in a terrible situation – yet they are trying everyday to do the best they can…and they are not beating up their loved ones or speeding on highways with guns and knives in every compartment in their motorcycle.

I think it is time for Delonte West to be held accountable for his actions. I hope he cleans up his act and sticks with his treatment – as by all accounts, he is a nice young man. But there is only so many excuses that the NBA or any other employer should be expected to accept.

One problem is that doing one's best isn't always enough to overcome the complexities of the problems. Another problem is that money can buy superior care, but superior care is no guarantee of ironing out those complex problems within any specific time frame. I haven't read anywhere that Delonte is refusing to get help. But I do know that "help" (regardless of its cost) is no guarantee of a quick remedy for mental illness.

Sam

I will leave this discussion alone, as I clearly dont know enough about it.

It was my impression that bi-polar disorder was controllable when you are under the right care and stick to the regiment. Guess I was mistaken.

One thing I know for sure is the young Mr West is much better off as a millionaire than some guy lying on the sidewalk near Park St Station. Hope he realizes the beneficial position his athletic talent has provided to him, and doesnt squander the opportunity to work on his problem.

Actually, no one really knows enough about bi-polar disorder, although more is known than half a century ago. It's truly a curse. And clearly having the money to get help is better than lying on a sidewalk. But it's no guarantee of a quick fix because the human mind can be as fickle for someone with money as for someone lying on sidewalk, Sometimes the suicides just involve more expensive bullets.

Sam

I don't claim to know much of anything about bi-polar or other mental illness, but I can see how it would be a surprisingly difficult situation for a guy like Delonte to get help. He is from Prince George's County, MD, which is a pretty rough area. Who knows how long he has been having problems, but if it was something short of being extremely obvious, in an area with plenty of people on the street and causing real problems in school, no one was likely to pay much attention to a moody basketball star's "problems." Then he became a potential meal ticket for his college, and then possibly for his friends, family, and professional associates. If a guy is in a facility getting treatment, he isn't out making millions of dollars playing hoops, which dollars can't then be shared with hangers on. If he can't play, he isn't helping the coach looking to secure his future with a great season. I don't know whether any of things are actually true in this case, but it is the kind of thing that happens all the time, in one form or another. It is not necessarily in the best interest of those in a position to intervene (as they see those interests) to actually do so.

Also, mental illness has a stigma in society, and especially in urban cultures and among athletes. It is perhaps easier for a regular guy, from whom no one expects all that much any way, to admit he has problems, than for a star athlete, who perhaps defines himself in large part through a number of masculine stereotypes, to do so. It is one thing to have a complete breakdown, but it is entirely another to limp along, hiding things so others don't notice and so you don't have to confront them.

This is simply a way of saying I can understand how this happens, without getting into whether Delonte or any one else should have done something about it earlier. Delonte obviously needs some help, which may or may not allow him to regain control of his life. I always liked him as a player and he seemed like a good guy off the court (not aware of any previous legal issues), but it is in his interest and everyone else's that he really grapple with whatever he has going on.

I'd also like to note that this is currently a claim of domestic violence. No charges have been filed and he has not been convicted, so let's wait and see what happens before rendering judgment (not that I'm terribly optimistic given his recent instability).

How much money one makes has little to do with determining the success and treatment of Bipolar Disorder, and Delonte's money and fame may even put him at a higher risk of pulling off bat-shit insane acts than a regular citizen would. Most health insurance coverage is good enough to receive the appropriate care. I don't come from a background of anything that could even be interpreted as modest wealth, but I had no problem being cordoned off to a psychiatric facility and eventually going through meetings with dozens of doctors and therapists until I found the few who intimately understood the illness and knew how to help me specifically as opposed some model they had read in a textbook. Believe it or not, quite a few medical professionals do not understand basic concepts of the illness any more than an average citizen does. That was a bit of a shock to me as I underwent treatment.

It took me a few months to find a good doctor in my area, but it took me a few years of trial and error before I found the right variety of medications. Nobody really has any way of knowing what will work for you until you give it a trial run, and this really sucks when you're already highly unstable and need immediate treatment. I was on Depakote initially for 2 weeks with my condition steadily worsening before my doctors realized it wasn't having any effect on me. Then I was finally put on a newer drug that relieved the psychosis, delusions and stabilized my mood, but caused me to gain 80 pounds in two months. So needless to say, I couldn't stay on that and I still hadn't found a preventative medication yet. It took another bout of mania, cycling and depression the following spring before I went on Lithium and that really has saved me for the last decade. However, the Lithium has already destroyed my thyroid and I need to switch to something else pretty soon. I really hope the bottom doesn't fall out when I start trying out new meds, Ive grown very fond of possessing a somewhat sane and stable mind again and I'm not in any rush to jump back off the deep end, but for the sake of my long term health I don't really have a choice.

My long-winded point is that it takes years to properly medicate and stabilize the illness, and a lifetime to maintain that stability. I'm what you could call a success story, being that I actually got my life back to a point where I have a decent quality of life, good enough job, interests, hobbies and people around me who care about me and vice versa. I would've been capable of doing much more with my life, or career and education, I should say, if regulating this illness on a daily basis wasn't so important. But all in all I can't complain. Like most everybody, I know of many people who've got it way worse than I do, and not just talking about mental illness.

One thing I've always been thankful for is that I got sick and discovered my illness when I was young and had little to lose. Delonte has everything to lose, his money, his career and possibly his life. He has more pressure on him than I could ever relate to, and that pressure when you're sick is definitely not helpful towards successful treatment. You don't have to like it, just try to understand that when someone is in an active stage of a mental illness, there is nobody steering the ship to make those rational decisions to get it together.

I won't expand on this topic anymore. I don't mind getting into it, but we're all here primarily to talk basketball and I'd like to try and keep it on focus. I've always like Delonte long before I knew that we share the same affliction, so I'm certainly pulling for him but I'm also hoping not to see his name popping up in the news anymore unless it's good news about his health (which the media is less likely to report).

Mr Green

Your post are great. Basketball is life as well. We can talk about life here. At least that's my opinion. I respect your experience and willingness to share it.

Jeb